No, no, no….. it’s not what you’re thinking…. Well, maybe it is, if you know me well enough…
Valentine’s Day…..because of my birthday being on December 25th, most holidays aren’t very special to me, and besides……. who the fuck says that there’s only ONE day you’re supposed to show affection to those around you?? Hmm?? Damned florist and card makers… and candy makers….. NO! Fuck that!! You should show those around you how you feel on a daily basis!!
Now with all that being said, it doesn’t mean that I DON’T like the extra attention….. I do, I do!! Seems oxymorononic, huh??? I’m complicated and extremely silly…. all of the time. It’s hard to explain my whole feelings on the holiday situation…..
I have tons of people around me, on a daily basis, and I have tons of acquaintances, a few friends, and only about a handful of extremely close friends. I love my closest friends and guard them and their privacy with my soul. I love every one of them and want them to feel special, and I know that I fail from time to time, but it doesn’t mean that I don’t still care deeply for them…. I’m just easily distracted and I get “obsessive” over things and ……. well, truthfully, yes, these are excuses….. I’m starting to think I might be a bit self-centered or, as my mom used to tell me, that I’m self-absorbed.
I try not to be that way, I’d like to think that I’m rather attentive…. in all aspects….. but, in that, I’m sure I fail too, from time to time….
I love, love, LOVE surprises….. I was always a curious child, so I would, typically, inadvertently discover things that were meant to be surprises, and though I was THRILLED when I found out the “secret/surprise” I was then disappointed that it was so easy for me to figure things out… oh, and it doesn’t help that my mother, Gods love her, didn’t want to lie to me, so she couldn’t/wouldn’t keep a secret if I guessed correctly…. needless to say, I figured out, fairly quickly, to quit guessing, else-wise I’d figure it all out….
In fact, surprises are the ONLY lies that are acceptable… I’ll forgive anyone for any lie involving a GOOD surprise!!!
What does all of that have to do with VD? Who knows….. well…. I do know… For the first time in my life, I’m happy…. sure I still have some stress, but not nearly as much as I’ve had, and it’s NOT stress about the relationships I’m in, it’s mostly about work.
Jumbled thoughts due to being cold and semi-sleepy…. I need to do laundry today, because if I don’t do it today, I’ll have to do it tonight after work, and I don’t get off work til midnight….. UGH……I’m trying to talk myself into doing it now, I said I would last night when I laid down…. woke up and was like OMGGGGG UGH…….. **stretch** OWIE!!! I din’t realise I’d be sore THERE from yesterday’s fuck fest…. oh wait, there was early morning with DD, (now granted we talked for most of the 5 hours I was over there and only had sex for about 20 minutes), and then a day or two ago with her. sure, I might seem like a “slut” to others, but you know what….. I’m having fun fucking……. so fuck off and quit being jealous because I’m getting more sex than you are…… seriously…. Everyone knows about the other, thus being in an OPEN RELATIONSHIP!! I don’t hide anything from SB nor her, and anyone else is told about them, and that they both know what I do with whom… hell, even SB asks for pictures, and I love having them taken…
So…… to go to the laundromat or take a nap? UGH…. I think my sore body’s winning over and the sleepiness is going to win too…… Just trying to get up in time to do laundry and then get ready for work….
FUCK I hate having to work 4 PM til Midnight tonight….. ah well, the trade off: I have the entire weekend off!! WOOTS!! Granted I asked for it off…but I know, just because I ask off doesn’t mean that I’ll get it….
Nappy time is calling me……mmhmm **nods** nappy time……
Happy VD……